Simply Romantic Nights
by Dennis and Barbara Rainey et. al.
(FamilyLife) is a box full of creative
ideas for promoting intimacy.
the Growing toward
oneness marriage
ministries newsletter is free at
marriages.net and includes monthly
insights into marriage and family
issues — and romance.
The 5 Sex Needs of Men
and Women: The Great
Marriage Video Series by
Dr. Gary and Barbara Rosberg
(Life Way Press) helps married couples
understand their sexual needs and
deepen their intimacy. The member
book and DvDs release in fall 2007.
52 Dates for You and Your
Mate by David and Claudia Arp
(Thomas Nelson) gets you out of the
routine of dinner and a movie.
Festivals of marriage,
sponsored by Lifeway Christian
Resources, offer a variety of classes
and settings, allowing couples to
tailor a weekend marriage getaway
to their liking ( lifeway.com/fom).
life by default. More often than not, it’s not the big crises that destroy a marriage. It’s the life-by-default mentality that can eat away at the appeal and anticipation of love.
Put the intrigue of the unexpected back into your marriage and watch the flame of love blaze. Planning creative ways to say “I love you” energizes your affection. Thinking of new ways to surprise your mate with creative, loving touches ignites your imagination. Of course, being on the receiving end is fun, too — kindling appreciation and anticipation.
Use these simple fire starters to ignite your imagination:
Husband: Create a scavenger hunt that leads her on a memory trail of your special times together. (Use fun hints and photos of the two of you.) End the hunt at a special place where you can make new memories together.
Wife: Write a provocative message on the bathroom mirror with lipstick or washable marker while he’s in the shower.
Husband: Mail her a formal invitation for a date. (Snail mail, not e-mail.) Make all the arrangements — where to eat, what to do, child care.
Wife: Joyfully participate in his favorite hobby or activity — especially if you’ve complained about it in the past.
Husband: Enlist your older children’s help to prepare a special meal for your wife before she gets home. Pick up a special dish from her favorite restaurant, and leave specific instructions with the kids for creating the atmosphere: tablecloth, candles, soft music. Have the kids meet her,
© Simon Jarratt/Corbis
open her car door, and usher her to the elegantly set table where her mysterious date is waiting. Let them serve as your waiters. (Don’t forget the tip.) This surprise accomplishes two things — you will bless your wife and give your kids a great lesson in married romance.
Wife: Kidnap him for a weekend and include tickets to see his favorite team or to do something he loves.
Guard the fire. Fire has both constructive and destructive uses. A fire in a home fireplace is enticing, provides warmth, and is relatively safe. But it becomes destructive when it escapes from its intended place.
The same is true of your marriage. When left unattended, the flame of your love will die out. If not properly guarded, a spark can escape the hearth of your relationship and start an affair, which will literally destroy your home. Keep your home fire burning brightly by constantly adding the fuel of surprise, spontaneity, and creativity.
This year use your imagination to rock your mate’s world through the element of surprise. Yes, it takes some planning, and occasionally it takes some money. But the payoff is fantastic! The result is a man who’s still captivated by the love of his wife and a woman who feels cherished and romanced by her husband. And when the flame of love is evident in your relationship, your children (and a watching world) will bask in the warmth of your godly marriage.
References:
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